What's wrong?
What the hell is wrong? With me? I've been meaning to write up my Hurricane Ike "adventures" and kept putting it off until it was all over - when we got electricity back. Well, that happened late Friday afternoon but in case you haven't noticed, there's still no big blog entry here about it all. And there just might not be, based on how I feel right now.
About noon on Friday, I reached some kind of limit I wasn't even sure I had. After two weeks of moving extension cords around the house, trying to cook on a single-burner camp stove, worrying about having enough gasoline to keep the generator going, using plastic plates and cups and utensils, hurried showers at a friend's house and zero time alone to decompress and process things, I decided to take a little "Me" time and go have my eyebrows threaded Friday afternoon. Now, the woman who has been performing this service for me is a terrific, wonderful, caring person who immediately saw that I was more than a little stressed when I arrived and therefore offered me a few minutes of quiet alone time, lying on her comfy almost-a-bed table before starting. But by the time she returned, I was in full sobbing breakdown mode, simply overwhelmed by dealing with it all (whatever the fuck "it" is) without a break. She calmed me down, sympathized, consoled and hugged me. Then she shaped my eyebrows. And you want to know how nice this woman is? She even cleaned up my runny ruined mascara for me before letting me up get up from her table.
When I got home, I took my son with me to buy gasoline for the generator and by the time we returned, our electricity was back on! So then I had to shut down the generator, plug things back in to wall outlets, turn on breakers, check that everything was functional again, remove the extension cords strung through the house and start cleaning up now that the mess was visible. Then I just stopped. I've been stopped ever since. I've got no energy and no initiative. Yes, I came to work today, and I'm doing my job (OK, not right this second because writing blog posts is not in my job description.) but I'm having to force myself. This is SO not me. There are a buttload of things I need to do, but ennui has set in big-time. I didn't play Haiku Friday. I didn't post about getting another piece featured at Blogger's Annex. I haven't posted my Ike story. I don't want to do anything. And I don't care.
About noon on Friday, I reached some kind of limit I wasn't even sure I had. After two weeks of moving extension cords around the house, trying to cook on a single-burner camp stove, worrying about having enough gasoline to keep the generator going, using plastic plates and cups and utensils, hurried showers at a friend's house and zero time alone to decompress and process things, I decided to take a little "Me" time and go have my eyebrows threaded Friday afternoon. Now, the woman who has been performing this service for me is a terrific, wonderful, caring person who immediately saw that I was more than a little stressed when I arrived and therefore offered me a few minutes of quiet alone time, lying on her comfy almost-a-bed table before starting. But by the time she returned, I was in full sobbing breakdown mode, simply overwhelmed by dealing with it all (whatever the fuck "it" is) without a break. She calmed me down, sympathized, consoled and hugged me. Then she shaped my eyebrows. And you want to know how nice this woman is? She even cleaned up my runny ruined mascara for me before letting me up get up from her table.
When I got home, I took my son with me to buy gasoline for the generator and by the time we returned, our electricity was back on! So then I had to shut down the generator, plug things back in to wall outlets, turn on breakers, check that everything was functional again, remove the extension cords strung through the house and start cleaning up now that the mess was visible. Then I just stopped. I've been stopped ever since. I've got no energy and no initiative. Yes, I came to work today, and I'm doing my job (OK, not right this second because writing blog posts is not in my job description.) but I'm having to force myself. This is SO not me. There are a buttload of things I need to do, but ennui has set in big-time. I didn't play Haiku Friday. I didn't post about getting another piece featured at Blogger's Annex. I haven't posted my Ike story. I don't want to do anything. And I don't care.
On 9/29/2008 3:41 PM,
Mr. Bill said…
I'm guessing most of Houston feels the same way. We're all a bit Ike'd out. :)
On 9/29/2008 4:04 PM,
heels said…
Just let yourself BE for a bit. It'll all come back much more easily if you don't try to force it.
On 9/29/2008 4:34 PM,
Suzy said…
It might not help but I'm in the same place. EXACTLY. My place looks like Ike came through. And I dont care either.
On 9/29/2008 5:24 PM,
hotdrwife said…
Meh, just rest up, honey. And enjoy your pretty eyebrows and a glass of wine.
On 9/30/2008 5:44 AM,
Jen said…
Oh, Jami, huge, huge hugs.
You've been through a LOT these past few weeks and it makes total sense that at some point, it would just get to you.
Often we collapse AFTER the trauma has happened. Just take the time you need to rest.
On 9/30/2008 1:50 PM,
soccer mom in denial said…
Of course you feel this way. Hopefully writing about "it" gives you the space to breath, retreat and enjoy the damn electricity.
But a woman who will do eyebrows AND give hugs? Well she is worth her weight in gold!!
On 10/01/2008 8:34 AM,
Anonymous said…
HUGE HUGE HUGE hugs, Jami. My god, you HAVE to be tired. It's not a mystery as to why you feel this way. "It" = "Ike", of course.
While no one died or was injured in your family, there is still trauma, grief, stress... One person can only take so much, you know? You actually need a vacation after all that, I'm sure. We only lost power for a few days but it still drained us, so I can't imagine going for two whole weeks.
Let the house be messy. Let things go by the wayside for a week. You need to relax.
OH and I am a clueless gal because I had no idea what threading was (At first, I was like, WTF, does this involve SEWING?!)
How cool! I googled it and saw a YouTube demonstration video. Kinda makes me want to try it (have it done, I mean).
On 10/03/2008 4:37 AM,
Nancy said…
Your body is just decompressing. And rightfully so. So stressful when our routine gets a blip on the screen. I'm thankful you are all safe. That's what really matters =)
(((hugs)))to you g'friend.
On 10/07/2008 9:25 AM,
Weekends Off said…
Your body is telling you enough is enough right now. What you need is peace, put on your blinders to the mess and fix yourself a drink and have a nice, long, hot bubble bath. I prescribe one per day, taken with your favorite magazine and or favorite cd playing in the background, followed by soft pajamas and then cuddles and kisses with your loved ones.
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